Marriage & Success

In marriage, the little things that seem insignificant, count.

Some people define a successful union by the material things that the couple has managed to accumulate. They’re wrong. Money doesn’t buy happiness. It can’t. It can buy a thrill for the moment but what happens after?

As you may be aware of by now, I’m a housewife. My husband brings home the bacon (but I actually buy it). My mornings consist of getting ready to take him to work and run errands and doing breakfast (most days) and if I’m not having a lazy day, a little tidying up before we leave. But what really puts the icing on the cake is the drive to and from work. We have one car, and after this morning, a second may seem like a nice idea but it’s definitely not a priority.

We’re preparing for a move in less than two weeks and I am trying to get things done around here that when the day comes, I’m not too stressed out and it’ll be a smooth transition. Today, I have a lot I would like to accomplish, so I told him to take the car as he’ll be meeting a friend later and there was no sense in me driving back and forth all day. Well I wish I didn’t do that. After he left, I was just pacing. I saw things that I wanted to work on, even made notes, but I just paced. Then as I decided to go into the shower, he called. My heart almost skipped a beat but this was  a good one. I wanted to call him but not while he was driving.

“I don’t want two cars. I feel a lonely. I miss you”

” 😦 I miss you too! Do you have a meeting? Can you turn around?”

“Yes I do. I can’t.”

“… I feel bad, I want to drive you to work now. I’ve been pacing. It won’t happen again. Love you.”

“Love you too. Bye”

Three years of marriage in September, 11 years as a couple in October. Through thick and thin, break-ups and make-ups, highs and very lows, we still can’t stand to be without the other. Car rides are our backbone. I used to wonder if he was using me as a chauffeur since he’d be either sleeping or responding to emails and messages while I drove but he’s not. Our best jokes, arguments, rants, sincerest conversations happen in the car. It’s our spot. It’s where our best communication occurs. We don’t need an extra car. Not now at least. And when kids come in the future, I’m sure we’ll make it work somehow.

Yes, we’d like to live comfortably and be able to travel whenever but it’s your relationship that matters more than anything. If we had the house with two cars and had to schedule time to see each other, I’m sure we’d be not anywhere near as happy as we are now. We’re young. We’re able to try out a high-rise building before we buy a house. Able to take trips together (we hate flying alone as well) and just be each other’s company. We don’t need words to communicate, one look says it all. The support we share for each other coupled with the fact that we know what we want/need from the other, minus the material things… I’d say we’re pretty successful.

11 years and I’m far from bored with him. I’d say we’re just getting started. 🙂

Real Simple












For the Real Housewives

For the Real Housewives

Lately, whenever I’ve been asked where I work I respond by saying “Fowler Inc.” with a straight face and enjoy the perplexed look I receive from the other person. There is no formal Fowler Inc. but for me there is (I have listed it as my place of employment on Facebook). I’m a housewife, and this job is just as serious as any other job. I run this family of two which we do wish to expand, therefore, in a few years there should be a minimum of four and maximum of six who am I kidding having four kids?!? I should make that three, is it too late???

Within a month of being married, my husband made it clear he had no desire to be following up on household stuff. I didn’t mind, it meant I wasn’t sitting twiddling my thumbs so as far as I knew, all was well. We’ll be married for 3 years in September and since October 2009, responsibilities have definitely increased.

Take our car for example. We’re a one car family – hey I don’t drive to work and he doesn’t need it during the day. Taking the car to get serviced etc is all up to me. Dealing with this is knowing what hour he needs to be at work, what hours I’ll be free to take it in and still be able to pick him up on time. I’m listed as the contact for everything. So car is finished – call Symone, we want to call and hassle you to buy your car – call Symone, there is a recall for a part on the car – call Symone, you get the idea?

Being the C.E.O. Of Fowler Inc. means I am the contact for everything and chances are, even when you need to speak to my husband about something I know more than he does on the issue (except anything to do with Comcast, that’s his department).

We started having a “family meeting” for me to know when my husband started work during the week to be helpful in choosing the best times to go the gym for personal training and syncing his work hours with any appointments I may have or he may have or need to be scheduled. This meeting time has now progressed to be the time where I decide what I will cook for the week so I also know how to shop at supermarket. Coordination just helps everything to run smoothly. I have a set day for laundry and cleaning is very spontaneous, but at least I know it happens during a certain period.

I’m always asked what do you do? Aren’t you bored? I run a family who is always on the go, I run a household with chores to be done as well as food to be made (we don’t like eating out a lot), I have to make sure everything on this ship runs smoothly and that 80% of the time there are no hiccups (I’m human I need a margin for error). I will never, and never have, mock the life of a real housewife. I’m not talking about the ones who have staff to run a household and say life is hard. I mean the ones who dig in and get dirty. Who schedule, coordinate, live on coffee to keep everything going smoothly so everyone is mostly happy. Every job is an opportunity for growth and humility. A chance to learn how to be more efficient and feel a great sense of pride in what you do. It doesn’t matter how others speak of your job when you know deep down that you have given it your best and feel some accomplishment for what you’ve achieved. Take pride and work your way up to bigger and better things.


#fastfoodthursdays on the menu 🙂