What a better way to end the year than with a post! Because I’ve kept you wrapped up in my posts all year………
Yes, take all that sarcasm for what it is but here I am wrapping up the year for you. Yay!
Navigating 2025 was truly the hardest of my motherhood journey. Seriously, with a 7 year gap, jumping back into this newborn/toddler life was the pits. Adding another (mobile, clingy) human to our chaos without extra help was definitely a challenge I wasn’t prepared for. No amount of therapy/hearing from other parents or even outside help could prepare me for this shit.
The first slap in the face was accepting I was older, and navigating my new postpartum body that I was trying hard mentally to accept and adjust to. Exercise, diet, adjusting to new normals, navigating postpartum being over 35 and with way more to deal with in general, lead to one thing – finding acceptance that this is a temporary phase, and dressing for that phase rather than sticking to the image in my head of where I should be right now. Reevaluating what I want in the future and being realistic on how achieving that might go. But, change was coming…
We got a nanny this year and she’s been amazing for our family. With that adjustment, after being a stay at home mom all these years, I won’t lie to you and tell you it was easy. I’m still struggling with giving up some responsibility and being more relaxed about things not being done how I’d do them but just accepting they were done and it’s one less thing for me to do. One thing I was very quick to appreciate was the freedom I used to enjoy while the big kids were in school. Simple things like going to the supermarket less stressed because I didn’t have to rush back home before the baby woke up as my husband was still in meetings but watching him on the monitor. Being able to go to the gym, a random massage to work these tired, stressed out muscles and getting a nail appointment guilt-free. I’m excited that she joined our family and that the kids all adore her. Again, change was coming.
With my return to the gym, I convinced myself I can be in a costume for Crop Over in August. As a back up, I paid for the option to back out of jumping if I didn’t feel like I was going to be comfortable. Let me just say, I *never* would have been in a costume 14 months postpartum after my first two kids. I appreciated this level of confidence I gained. I told my trainer and everyone else, the costume gets what it gets once I can squeeze into it because the journey to it was definitely not going as planned. If there’s one thing I came to accept, it was that I birthed 3 kids, they had a mom who was present and there for them when they needed her. This is not a permanent physical state for me and I can look back on memories and show I was there and not letting little insecurities deter me. That was my biggest takeaway for this year – this is all temporary, and I can get back to, or close to where I was, if not entirely back to it. After all, after each kid, our bodies are only trying to say you did this and things won’t be the same but you’re stronger mentally and physically! So I took another leap here… As I’m bridging the gap to 40, I wanted to work on something that gym wasn’t going to help with. I lifted and expanded the girls. I had the option for lipo at my fingertips but I took it off the table. WHY?! Because, truthfully, at the end of the day, I think of everyone else before I think of myself. I also saw it as a challenge for myself in the gym. I already had to go 2 weeks without lifting the clingy baby, I couldn’t add to that extra time and I still thought of the older kids and what they had going on at school. Some people would’ve jumped at that opportunity but I don’t think I’ve done too bad after 3 kids and I can wait a little longer to achieve those goals. Ideally, I’ll be there by my 40th and I’m just along for the journey still trying to be present for the kids whenever possible right now. Change… it’s coming.
So we took 4 trips overall this year – Vegas, Maui, London and Barbados. Absolute madness with an active infant/toddler in tow. But we did it. I did it. New memories, lessons and experiences were gained. Making travel arrangements and packing for 5 people 4 times was no joke. So we kept our butts quiet for Christmas and did a staycation. Yes, I still had to pack but at least it was a much smaller scale. I think I’ll be more prepared for whatever 2026 brings on that front. I don’t think we’ll be so crazy next year but I won’t rule it out. There are always experiences to be had, challenges to overcome and life to be lived. Life is not stagnant and if it was I know I’d be a very miserable person. I live for this temporary stressed out life and for the love we’re all surrounded by. Change is coming, and I’m first in line to accept it.
Just a Dash 