Marriage & Success


In marriage, the little things that seem insignificant, count.

Some people define a successful union by the material things that the couple has managed to accumulate. They’re wrong. Money doesn’t buy happiness. It can’t. It can buy a thrill for the moment but what happens after?

As you may be aware of by now, I’m a housewife. My husband brings home the bacon (but I actually buy it). My mornings consist of getting ready to take him to work and run errands and doing breakfast (most days) and if I’m not having a lazy day, a little tidying up before we leave. But what really puts the icing on the cake is the drive to and from work. We have one car, and after this morning, a second may seem like a nice idea but it’s definitely not a priority.

We’re preparing for a move in less than two weeks and I am trying to get things done around here that when the day comes, I’m not too stressed out and it’ll be a smooth transition. Today, I have a lot I would like to accomplish, so I told him to take the car as he’ll be meeting a friend later and there was no sense in me driving back and forth all day. Well I wish I didn’t do that. After he left, I was just pacing. I saw things that I wanted to work on, even made notes, but I just paced. Then as I decided to go into the shower, he called. My heart almost skipped a beat but this was  a good one. I wanted to call him but not while he was driving.

“I don’t want two cars. I feel a lonely. I miss you”

” 😦 I miss you too! Do you have a meeting? Can you turn around?”

“Yes I do. I can’t.”

“… I feel bad, I want to drive you to work now. I’ve been pacing. It won’t happen again. Love you.”

“Love you too. Bye”

Three years of marriage in September, 11 years as a couple in October. Through thick and thin, break-ups and make-ups, highs and very lows, we still can’t stand to be without the other. Car rides are our backbone. I used to wonder if he was using me as a chauffeur since he’d be either sleeping or responding to emails and messages while I drove but he’s not. Our best jokes, arguments, rants, sincerest conversations happen in the car. It’s our spot. It’s where our best communication occurs. We don’t need an extra car. Not now at least. And when kids come in the future, I’m sure we’ll make it work somehow.

Yes, we’d like to live comfortably and be able to travel whenever but it’s your relationship that matters more than anything. If we had the house with two cars and had to schedule time to see each other, I’m sure we’d be not anywhere near as happy as we are now. We’re young. We’re able to try out a high-rise building before we buy a house. Able to take trips together (we hate flying alone as well) and just be each other’s company. We don’t need words to communicate, one look says it all. The support we share for each other coupled with the fact that we know what we want/need from the other, minus the material things… I’d say we’re pretty successful.

11 years and I’m far from bored with him. I’d say we’re just getting started. 🙂

Real Simple

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

xx

 

 

What I’ve learned living in Seattle


Technically I live in Bellevue but it’s still “part” of Seattle. Anyway, as I was driving on the road recently I was observing the weather which led to me consider writing the post. So here are a few things I’ve learned while living in Seattle since 2009.

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Weather

Compared to what I grew up knowing as rain, Seattle has more of a mist than actual rain. And it’s annoying. You keep getting this feeling like will it just rain and stop? It’s sooo annoying to have this “heavy mist” building up on your face. To light for an umbrella but heavy enough to need a hood. Sometimes, you can still wear sandals in it. Yes it’s weird like that. However, despite the more gloomy than sunny days, I have grown extremely appreciative of the sun as well as sensitive. I grew up in the sun and now if I stay out in it too long (even if it isn’t hot) my skin gets really sensitive to the touch. I’m trying to be consistent with taking my Vitamin D, because Lord knows I don’t get enough of it naturally. I’m learning to live with the cold and found out layering is key. I haven’t perfected layering to deal with the weather but I’m getting there.

Driving

NEVER blow your horn… never. For you will be wrong. Yes! YOU will be wrong if you toot your horn at someone who’s been sitting still at the green light. You will be wrong for doing it to someone who put on their signal while changing over to your lane. You just don’t blow your horn here. If you do, you’re a foreigner. I’ve somewhat adapted though, I count to 10 first then blow the horn if you haven’t move so, technically, I gave you a chance.

Lifestyle

People here are very zen, there isn’t much of a rush (except during Christmas). This also relates to the driving it seems. People are very laid back and it’s not about “look at me!” – you have every right to express yourself as you see fit. If there is a lot of plastic surgery I don’t see it and feel free to carry any designer label while looking like you just got out of bed, don’t make any effort to say I showered. It’s hard to get dressed up around here. It would have to be for a occasion or Saturday night. Women here don’t do heavy make-up unless they work at a make-up counter or that’s how they express themselves, but the majority doesn’t.

One of the places I encounter this “I live in a bubble” attitude is at the gas station I go to, where people are intent on getting to a certain pump and have no regard for the fact that they are blocking the road. They’re basically saying “you need to find a way around me as I’m not moving because I’m next”. Now honestly, the gas station isn’t the only thing there, you have a supermarket and mini strip mall, we just want to pass and obviously that’s hard with traffic coming down and you sticking out in the road just because you have to be next in line! I encounter some of the most selfish drivers on this road daily and it’s scary more than anything. I truly believe that a lot of people live in bubbles and only see themselves on the road. For that reason, I try not be on the road close to lunch time as traffic increases and these hungry people need to dash out for lunch and get back to the office within an hour and here you see the extremes – the crazy drivers and the ones who aren’t in a rush and drive well below the speed limit. I play music… it’s the only thing that helps my road rage. I’ll end that there 😛

Outdoors

Now Washington is known as the “evergreen state”. I am truly thankful that it’s here my husband ended up working. Despite the gloominess 300 out of 365 days, the atmosphere is one that relaxes you. I have been able to think and write more on the days I just stare outside at the mist. However, I am NOT an outdoor person and this is one of the activities a lot of Washingtonians take part in. I have considered getting a bike, but it’s not sunny enough and I won’t be riding in the mist and cold. I also have a fear of grasses touching me because when I was younger we used to go hiking around Barbados and I broke out into a rash or just itch like crazy after going through some grass areas, so I prefer to just stay away from it. And I don’t like bugs or wildlife unless there is a cage or glass or wire separating us. So outdoors just isn’t for me but I adore the greenery around this place.

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On a serious note, God knows what he’s doing when he puts us in certain places outside of what we’ve known to be our way of life for a while. Being so far away from family and friends has made me more thankful for them and also to know who my true friends are and strengthened a bond between my husband and myself. We only have each other up here and it’s been interesting growing in our marriage without the interference of family and others. If we had to pick up and go I’ll be happy wherever we go once it’s not colder than here  knowing that this adventure of life can only get better with every challenge we face, and we can only grow wiser with time.

xx

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Foot on the brakes


WHY is cleaning so hard? I think deep down inside I’ve given up because I know we’re moving and also I’m getting new bits of furniture to help keep me more organized but I really can’t bring myself to tidy up what I have now! Yesterday and Monday weren’t bad but I’ve lost all momentum today. I have been on point with cooking though… I did some killer bbq wings yesterday and.. OH YES! I drove on the freeway while it was snowing for the first time yesterday… SCARY SHIT! I’ve always hopped into the passenger seat when there was snow and let hubby deal with that but the snow came down pretty heavy as I got onto the freeway. Very sneaky as it wasn’t even falling like that on the exit to the freeway. *sigh* There was a lot of screaming.. “SLOW DOWN!” “I AM!!” *silence* “WATCH THAT CAR!” “I SAW IT!” *silence*. Needless to say, the tension was high. I’ve driven on the freeway with the rain falling hard (scary shit also) but the snow was just crazy, luckily it didn’t stick. We’ve been having some crazy weather and I’m really over the cold. I mean really over it. I am dying for one day of 50F. This 30/40F for a whole week is crazy, especially when going to the gym. And it never ceases to amaze me how I think I’m prepared for how cold outside may be but as I open the door and run down to the car I still jump like “where the hell did that cold air come from?!”. I swear I’m too delusional sometimes.

Anyway, back to the cleaning (*yay* cleaning >_>). I don’t want to keep buying things to help temporarily but at the same time it’s really hard to know what to do with things that you know you won’t be using for a while or before you move and have to unpack all over again. I think this weather is really turning me miserable more than anything. I’m probably staying home too much. Yeah, that’s it. I’ve been home a lot. It was better when I was home a minimum of two days a week and was busy… Well, time to get busy again then! But not cleaning. I’ll still attempt to do bits and pieces around the place throughout the day but this whole day of cleaning is so not working.

I think I’ll end this ramble here with a few favorites that I’ve been blasting..

I’m somewhat ashamed to put this song by Selena Gomez but I absolutely love it.. >_<

xx