To Celebrate Or Not To…

Like many other moms/parents, I had a debate over what to do for baby’s first birthday. One comment I heard often was “they’re not going to remember it anyway!”. At first I agreed, and thought there shouldn’t be much fuss to it.

After we got back from our travels in January, Kai returned to his usual Gymboree class and he’d advanced to Level 3. My big boy! He was SO HAPPY at class that I decided to inquire about availability for his birthday. Someone had already booked March 26th so I took April 2nd.

I had two reasons for booking this. 1) Gymboree was clearly his happy place that you really saw his true personality and happiness come out. 2) We were in the process of purchasing our home and I didn’t know how things would be and all I had to do was provide food – less stress for me.

Now, I also did this because, regardless of whether or not he’ll remember it (he’ll get to see pics too!!), we’ve had our little one for a year. A year that flew by so quickly that made us grow as parents, showed us that there is a whole other level of love and, seeing our little one in his element just brings so much joy to us that we want to share it with others.

NOTHING prepares you for parenthood. Not being a nanny, not being a babysitter, not being an aunt… NOTHING. I’m an aunt and I helped my sister a lot. I also babysat a bit before moving to America. Nothing prepared me for having my own child.

Now I’m not telling you that you must have a birthday party for your little one, but consider how much has changed and happened in that      one year and see it as a cause for celebration, in any form or fashion. Celebrate it. We see everyday how short life can be. We see how quickly our lives change once we’ve had a baby and how quickly that baby grows to be a toddler.

I love to celebrate birthdays. I love the opportunity to celebrate reaching another year with my loved ones. I’m not able to celebrate it with all of my family and friends now that I live so far away from them so I will do the most with whoever is near and dear to me.

Just a little food for thought 🙂 .

Photo: The Plum Blogger

:: One of my favorites from a mini shoot we did at home with our friends for his 1st birthday. ::

“Don’t grow up, it’s a trap.”

This phrase couldn’t be truer. Getting older is all about finding ways to deal with responsibilities. That’s why it’s a trap. Parents may tell you about saving money and to make sure you have a good job and get paid well. But how many really sit down and educate you on how to balance your expenses with your income? How many really let you know about dealing with setbacks and how to get back on track when you encounter difficulty, all while trying to keep a household running smoothly? Stress is real and if you don’t know how to deal with it, it could be your biggest downfall.

Everyone isn’t dealt an easy hand in life. Financial and emotional problems can really take their toll, separately and when coupled, and everyone has a different way of dealing with stress. I’m a comfort eater and it sickens me. To make it worse, when I am in that mode, working out is the last thing I want to do but at the same time I get mortified at the thought of gaining more weight. Weird huh? I know. I’m trying to channel all of my stress into workouts. It’s not easy but I figured the best I could do, as a small step, is go for a walk whenever I find myself slipping food wise or feeling stressed.

There are times when you just feel so overwhelmed you just want to break down and cry and it doesn’t seem like things are looking up for you. My motto for these times is to give yourself one day. One day to have a good cry, get it all out and figure out how you want to deal with it. Crying and looking for handouts or someone to take on what you’re feeling doesn’t help you or whomever you’re trying to drag into your misery. Find some way of dealing with your problems. I also try to write how I’m feeling to get all of my feelings out, obviously, you don’t have to literally write, you can just create an online journal. But the point is to get it all out. Angry with your neighbor? Write out what you’d really say to them and give it a day to cool down. Then contact whoever you have to, neighbor, Landlord or police, in a calm manner and deal with the situation. Getting crazy doesn’t help anyone and only makes things worse for you.

I’ve been feeling at my wits end recently. I feel like I have way more on my plate than I could handle and dealing with it all is a bit stressful but I’m trying to tackle everything that comes my way with a level head instead of panicking and running to a corner to hide. I guess I’m maturing. I feel like if it’s not for me, attack it the same time and do not let it drag on. If it’s bothering me, think and try different ways to tackle it that I can move forward in a positive note. 

If we let stress get to us, we cannot perform at our best. We cannot communicate or focus in an effective manner and we only dig a hole and bury ourselves deeper into the ground. Try different forms of communicating and dealing with issues, and never forget to consider your behavior in everything that you do. You can blame everyone around you, but look at your behavior to see how you may be contributing to it, and work on it. It takes 3 weeks to create a new habit and 3 months to lose an old one. Change begins with you and you have to know how to promote positive change within yourself before you expect and demand it from others.



It Can’t Hurt

I was in dire need of retail therapy today. We had a lovely day yesterday for our anniversary but we went to an appointment this morning that didn’t leave me in the best of moods.

When I dropped my husband off at work, I said: “gonna be a retail therapy day…” He smiled and went on his way. Little did I know how much therapy I was about to receive.

I went to Neiman Marcus to see if they had any bags I may be interested in and as I was ready to leave, this lady pops up and asks me if I’ve seen the “it” bag for Fall. I said no and followed her over to it. She was bubbly and full of life I couldn’t resist. She wasn’t the average salesperson trying to get a sale out of you. I sensed that.

Long story short – we ended up speaking for about 45mins (could be less or more but it was long) after she helped me decide on a bag that they didn’t have in the color I wanted.

We spoke about things that people who’ve known me for longer than 45mins don’t know about. Therapy. Most of all, it was the connection felt and shared over life stories. She is a little older than I am but her words weren’t maternal in nature and she brought comfort to me.

Kristen, you’ve given me that push to Let go and Let God. That the average American isn’t atheist nor a Pentecostal pushing their beliefs down my small Catholic throat, but that where there is that common understanding that He exists and you’re not alone, we can get through whatever life throws in our face.

Thank you.

Sometimes, it can’t hurt to open up to strangers. You never know what may come your way.