Uncategorized

Inner Peace

by SymoneF1 Comment on Inner Peace

I can’t put my finger on it but there is something that is taking over me. I feel peace within myself, like everything is going to be OK. I usually stress about small things, and things I cannot control but still attempt to control. Can it be something that happens with age? Or is this the calm before the storm? I’ve had a few hiccups this year but even though I know there are some things I can’t control, I feel like they’ve been lifted from me and whatever happens was meant to happen. I can fight for love, family, (some) friends, but at the end of the day, not everything is worth the fight and you have to give up control and let things happen as they were supposed to.

Besides prayer and church, music (Adele & Livvi Franc) is the one thing that I find soothes my core. It can either make me very emotional or lift my spirits to where they should be giving me this positive force to move forward with. It’s still in my nature to think of the future and how what I do today will affect it. Not just relationships and financial decisions but little crap like if I tidy up a room too early I give myself the chance to make it untidy again before someone comes to visit and have to clean it all over again (see what I mean? crap!).

Unfortunately, over the years, this stressing over crap has lead to tension headaches, tension in my shoulders (probably leading to the headaches) and this tendency to always look serious. Apparently from small I always had the pensive look but as I got older and with the age of Botox, I’m reminding myself that the less pensive I am the less I qualify for this treatment. I don’t know why I tend to “overthink” things (and in the process end up with some warped conclusion). I’ve moved from wondering about stuff to wondering why I’m thinking about this stuff and why I’m giving myself a furrowed brow over it. See?! I was just very tensed thinking about that sentence and writing it. Look away and come back to reality… WOOSAH!

Deep breaths. Is it necessary? Is it really going to affect my life as much as I think it will or is it something I’m trying to control that I have no control over? Why? Why am I going on about it? Amazing how much taking a deep breath and calming yourself can help a relationship as well. Ever realized how much nothing is resolved when two people are shouting at each other? Inner peace → calm mind, calm heart → rational thinking → less stress! You can’t the other person’s actions but you can control yours. Once you have control over yourself, you can react responsibly. This also means self control. If you know you get angry quick, it means you have to train yourself. I had to do this (still working on it in some aspects) because I had to think if it’s worth getting a migraine over or not.

In the end, you are responsible for your actions. It’s like eating 2 scoops of ice cream everyday and wondering where the weight came from. All of our actions have answers. I can only find inner peace if I accept I CANNOT control everything- that sometimes I need to be in the backseat and not the driver of every car I get into. No one said it was easy, but you have to be willing to find it within yourself to let it happen. Reflect on your life, where it’s going, what you want it to be and know that the only person stopping you is yourself. Obstacles may arise but you are the one who decides if they’ll stop you or how you will get around it. If you have wrongs to right, do it sooner rather than later.

*On another note*

I’ve been listening to these two songs for the last two hours (my neighbours probably want me to shut up).. Enjoy 🙂

Life, Uncategorized

Abandon

by SymoneFLeave a Comment on Abandon

I’m a member of a group on Facebook for poets, lyricists and musicians. A new topic was added today, and for the first time since I joined the group, I felt this urge to write on this topic (not saying I didn’t before but today I stopped everything and began to write). The topic was “Abandon”. I expected most people to write about being abandoned by someone but I wanted my poem to give another aspect that most probably wouldn’t think to give. You see, today was sunny AND warm, and for the first time for the year in Bellevue, Wa sweat poured from me due to the “heat” that I felt. It wasn’t even 60 degrees yet but I felt it. So I hope you understand and like my poem and my perspective of “abandon”.

I waited patiently, still I could not see,

What was owed to me yet not meant to be.

A peek would do but wouldn’t be the same,

I longed for the warmth but it never came.

A few months passed,

The light was dim in my heart.

Finally a ray of hope,

Of what could be the start.

The cool breeze couldn’t stop

The water that ran,

The sweat was welcomed,

Running down my hand.

Alas I can see and feel

All that I waited for.

The warmth of the sun

And the sweat that poured.

No longer shall I feel abandoned and ashamed

An island girl playing the Winter game.

Do you like?

Today, I’m going to the gym for the third day in a row, and as tired and sore as I am, I can’t stop this flow that my husband has so I’ve got my playlist together and I’ll just stay on the treadmill for about half an hour. Something is better than nothing and I have to keep these muscles in check so they don’t get out of shape again. Dinner is finished so we can eat when we return and I need to be in bed early as tomorrow starts earlier than usual. I’m happy, and I’m happy that even though I do not work, my days are filled with things to do even if I don’t know what the hell I’m doing and I still have a supportive husband. Count your blessings one by one and remember just be happy to have life and live it to the fullest. 🙂

Lots of love and sunshine

xx

Food, Life, Uncategorized

Timeout!! Go sit in the corner!

by SymoneFLeave a Comment on Timeout!! Go sit in the corner!

Let me start by saying that I am not in any way qualified to give nutritional advice or anything. I’m merely trying to help others who live in the real world based on my experiences. I was talking to a male friend today and he mentioned he didn’t like the weight he’d put on (he likes to stay in shape) but with school and exams things we going downhill with him cooking for himself and also his choices in food whenever he bought it. This post is for him.

Now, last year I gained 10lbs quickly in a matter of less than 3 weeks when I chose to start putting whey protein in the shakes I got after I exercised but at the same time I also started to exercise less, while maintaining the diet of someone who was exercising regularly. I felt disgusted with myself. I didn’t know why it happened at first and was wondering how am I going to get rid of this excess weight. Gym wasn’t much of an option as it wasn’t close to home and I wasn’t pushing myself as I should whenever I went, nor did I have someone to help push me. So I decided diet was next on the list. If there’s one thing I have control over 24 hours a day it’s what I eat. So if you’re wondering what this title of this post has to do with what I’m saying it’s about DISCIPLINE. You deserve a timeout to think about your habits for the day when you know you haven’t been going according to plan. I gave myself one yesterday and I’m trying to get back on track.

Back to what I was saying before. I had become a Mocha junkie living up here with the constant cold weather, and to assist in my diet overhaul, I started weaning myself off of it and drinking more tea – no milk, no calories, just a teabag and a small teaspoon of sugar. We often go out every Friday night to dinner, and I LOVE my dessert, so I started eating less of my dinner (cut out the drinking during a meal if you can) so that after I ate my dessert (which was usually small) I’ll be satisfied and not full. This brings me to another discipline, portion control. I’ve mentioned this before I’m sure but it’s more than relevant to this post. Over-eating is just bad on the whole. Where’s the fun in going out and eating and not being able to enjoy the evening when you’re too full to think about anything other than sleep? No Sir! It’s not for you! If it’s food you cooked, take out less than what you’d normally eat, and tell yourself “seconds are not allowed!”. That right there is a start, because when you go out you know that you have that control and you can do it as well. NEVER FEEL ASHAMED THAT YOU COULDN’T FINISH YOUR MEAL. It’s not a competition, enjoy your meal until your are satisfied, get a doggy bag if you have to but don’t go overboard.

Another aspect of “eating out” is buying food to take home. You know how it goes, late night and you really don’t feel to cook but you’ll stop at Subway or the supermarket and get a rotisserie chicken and something to eat on the side. If you’re going to buy that rotisserie chicken, buy some noodles/rice and stir-fry veg (pre-cut) and go home and make yourself a nice stir-fried meal. You could be reducing your sodium intake and eating healthier with the dish you made . You could also do a chicken salad if you don’t want a heavy meal at night. The point is to be in control of some part of the meal and your portions.

From the portion control alone, I managed to lose 13lbs in about 5 months. It is second nature to me now to simply eat enough to keep myself satisfied, and now with exercise, I feel like I’m on the right path to maintaining a healthy weight and physique, and to simply be happy with myself physically.

I am not saying this is what you must do, it’s just me sharing my experience that may help you. By the way, those Godiva truffles are out as of tonight. I firmly believe in living life to the fullest, but at the same time – everything in moderation. Depriving yourself of something doesn’t make things better.

Lots of love,

xx