C-Sections


I think by now you’ve realized that this is more a mom blog than lifestyle blog. It’s just that parenting has become my lifestyle and is something I’m all about sharing. I don’t think I ever shared my birth story but I had a natural birth and if you want to hear about it and me playing the Lion King song… let me know below.

Recently, my friend wrote about her C-section experience for her friend and shared it with me. Naturally, I asked if I could share it here, and she said yes!! I’ve edited it to take out a few personal bits and generalized it since I don’t know what anyone is having. And if you’re having a boy, seeing “she/her” all the time would be annoying lol. I don’t think I could’ve had a better person write and share their experience because she has definitely lightened the mood if you were having one and are worried.

Enough small talk. Enjoy…

C-Sections – as told by Sabrina 🙂

There are so many things that I wish I had known going in, so I’d love to pass this stuff on. Especially, because it isn’t going to be written on the interwebs.

Prep for you

* If it’s something that you care about; clean the house now because you literally can’t for 6 weeks. 

* Get large pads! You’ll still bleed even though it wasn’t a vaginal birth.

* Buy the biggest underwear you can get!! I ended up cutting the (fuck I don’t know what the word is…) strap thingy on top that holds them up. It would constrain my innards and mess with my incision. 

* Put on bed sheets that you don’t care about, just in case. 

C-Section

Are you going to go into labor first, or will they induce on a specific day? I can explain the process if it’s labor, but if you’re just going in then here’s what will happen.

* You’ll get an epidural. You’ll bend forward and usually be facing your husband who WILL HOLD YOUR HAND! They numb you first. That needle is surprising and isn’t pleasant. Then they stick the tube in that delivers medicine. The tube will stay in you until after the surgery. I actually You-tubed the procedure to know what to expect.

* Your husband will put on scrubs, you’ll get a hat, and have to take a shot of gross orange stuff. They’ll also shave your bikini line. The incision is much lower than you’d expect! 

– At this point, I was shaking uncontrollably. I’m sure it was the adrenaline. Just the thought of actually having a baby was really hitting me and I was super excited and scared. My teeth kept chattering. I bit my tongue so much to try and stop it. Know that this can happen. 

* Nurses will lift you onto a gurney and roll you into the OR. It’s bright, white, cold and full of people staring at you naked. You won’t care.

* They’ll set you up on the table and start prepping the room. They’ll give your husband a seat by your head. Your arms will be spread out like Jesus. The anesthesiologist will be right there, pumping you up with drugs. Keep telling them to do more if you even feel the slightest bit of them pinching! 

* When you confirm that you can’t feel anything, they will start. It takes a little bit, because there are a lot more layers on your innards than you’d expect. 

Eventually, they’ll reach in and pull out baby! You can breathe again – holy shit!! You don’t get to see them yet though. They will take the baby to check vitals and get cleaned up. Your husband will be called to meet the baby, cut the cord, take pictures, etc. Then they’ll bring them back for you to meet. It’s the most surreal thing you can imagine. 

Overall, the surgery takes about 30-45 minutes. When you’re done you go back into the recovery room for about an hour and a half, after which they transfer you to a much smaller room.

Hospital Stay for you

* They’ll keep telling you that it’s important to sleep. But there will be someone in the room with you once every hour. Whether it’s for testing you or your child. That first night, you won’t sleep at all. And you’ll want to murder everyone. Not much you can do about it.

* Unfortunately, one of the tests for you is to press on your belly (a few times a day) to make sure you’re healing up correctly. It sucks balls. But the pain goes away quickly and you can keep pressing your awesome pain meds button to up the dose. 

* Nurses will make you stand up quicker than you’d want to and believe you’re capable of. But you have to do it! If anything, you have to try. 

* I was so drugged that I’m not sure when I was able to get the catheter and IV out. All I remember is that I had a goal of getting to the bathroom and peeing 3 times in order for me to get one of them out. For the catheter removal, take a deep breath and exhale. It’s just heeby jeebies, not pain. And I didn’t know that the IV isn’t a needle but a little tube; just like the epidural. So it’s not painful if you bend your hand.

* The hospital gave me a spray bottle to fill with warm water and aim at my nethers in order to pee and not be in pain. Luckily, it’s not as bad as it could have been with a vaginal delivery. Pooping, will take a while, even for those of us with IBS. The drugs they give you stop you up. Don’t push it though. Literally. Don’t strain.

* Before you go, they’ll take out the staples in your incision. I was terrified. It isn’t that bad. Just have a normal chat with your husband as a distraction.

Hospital Stay for baby

* Baby will get a bath, and you’ll be taught how to do this.

* Nurses will also show you how to swaddle and change a diaper.

* There will be a hearing test that usually takes 5 minutes, but the baby must be awake for it.

* They do heel pokes to draw blood. The blood spots will go onto pieces of paper to conduct tests. They’ll need several of these. They will cry and your heart will break. 

* If you want me to tell you about jaundice procedures, let me know. Logan had it.

Checking out of the hospital

* Ask the nurses for things before you go. More pads (they’re like diapers) and the mesh undies. I can’t stress enough, how much I loved the undies!!

* I’m not sure how your hospital does it, but if it’s anything like my experience, you’ll need to complete a checklist. This will include seeing you and testing you on your car seat. So figure that shit out before you go in. You’ll need to pack baby in super tight! 

Recovery

It is very important to heed the doctor’s advice – DON’T DO ANYTHING!! You can take care of and hold your child, but that’s it. No cleaning, laundry, dishes, vacuuming, bending over unless absolutely necessary, etc. Walk slowly and only in your house. Don’t leave your house. Don’t use stairs unless you have to (I have 16 to get up to my place. I didn’t leave for 2 weeks).

You will be so fucking frustrated that you can’t do anything because some days you feel like you can. But you will pay for that dearly! So don’t even be tempted! 

They probably won’t prescribe you enough pain pills. So make sure you set up a follow up appointment before they go away. You’ll have to go back in, but they will give you more. 

Speaking of pills, you’ll have lots to take. Make a chart so you don’t forget any. You need to take all of them to heal. I had to set my alarm for some in the middle of the night – not like you’ll really be sleeping at first anyways. 

There’s a 6 week checkup and they’ll give you the go ahead to have sex and resume activities. LOLOLOL!! You’ll still need time. I say 8 weeks before you can actually walk at a normal pace. And have lube for sex. Even with a C-section, your junk is messed up and dry. 

I think I felt worlds better by 10 weeks. That’s sleeping on my stomach, ability to jog, carry groceries, Rufio (dog), bend over, do laundry – everything. 

The only lasting effects I have are some tenderness on my underbelly (you’ll have a deflated basketball belly after the baby comes out) and numbness on my scar (apparently that’s normal and will last forever).

I know it’s a lot to take in (that’s what she said) but you’ll have your baby with you the whole time and they’ll be a great distraction! 

 

The Sleep Debate


We moved Kai to his room around 7 months. It would’ve been sooner but my husband was traveling for work for a few days and I didn’t want to deal with the transition alone so we waited until after. I told my husband it was his job as I couldn’t deal with the crying etc. On the first night I barged into the room, took Kai up and rocked him to sleep. Up until February, the rocking to sleep continued every night unless my husband was the one that put him down for the night. We shifted to sitting on the floor but still nestled in mummy’s arms to go to sleep.

Over the months he’s gotten bigger and heavier. The cradling positions have gotten awkward but it’s what he loves to do to go to sleep. I’ve always called him a “cuddler” because he really loves a cuddle to go to sleep.

The great debate comes when there are some nights when he doesn’t want to go to sleep and takes forever. This usually happens when I have things I want to get done before I go to bed. So there is frustration on my part and excitement on his. On those nights I wished we’d sleep trained him and I could put him down and walk out the room… but only on those nights.

Other nights, he hugs me to sleep. There’s nothing that melts my heart more than when he wraps his little chunky wrist around my neck as if to say “I love you mummy, don’t put me down please” or “I hope this makes up for the day I gave you”. The latter would be nice if he hugged me to sleep on days when he was a handful! My battle comes when I think, he won’t want to do this in the near future, so should I cherish it and enjoy it? Or am I creating a lasting habit of not being able to fall asleep at night on his own?

I’m trying not to read into it too much but I can’t help but think of what it could mean or what’s the next step instead of just living in the moment…

Kitchen Lessons


Now that I have a toddler, parenting lessons are happening every day but I’ve been trying my best to not just see it as a phase but understand what his needs are.

I’m learning that my little one loves to watch and be in the kitchen with me. He loves to see what I’m stirring, chopping, and putting in the oven. I can only hope it means that he’ll take up cooking as a hobby at some point. Not a chef though, I think it’ll be hard to get him to cook for family gatherings… so just a hobby.

Since we moved into our house though, he’s had more cupboards, a new gas range and new ovens to explore. I try my best to keep him away from them but I can only do so much. I’ve resorted to putting him in his high chair and giving him snacks while I cook. That way he can still see what’s going on but from a little distance. He’s also aware that after his bath, when he hears the gas stove ignite that I’m warming his milk to have before bed and insists on me picking him up so he can watch the pot.

I thought I could teach him to stop going in the cupboards and pulling at everything but his kitchen shenanigans have taught me a few things.

  1. One of the reasons he does it, is to get my attention. When he comes to me and I’m busy with dirty hands, he opens every cupboard door and touches things or pulls them out until I pick him up. I finally bought cupboard locks on Monday.
  2. Babies can’t talk and when they exhibit a certain behavior, in your frustration, it’s better to try to understand their needs than think they’re being naughty.
  3. I should’ve bought those locks when we moved in. Even though it’s only been 3 days and they’re driving me insane.
  4. This is a natural learning behavior – to be inquisitive. While it should be encouraged, I do not need to have it happen all the time so the locks will help me keep my sanity a bit. It is a teaching moment for both of us – it’s teaching me patience and he’s learning about the kitchen and what is used in it.

There may be a million books on parenting but the one thing you don’t need a book for is patience – it’s at the heart of parenting. We all have our days when our patience is wearing thin or is practically non-existent, just make sure those days aren’t the norm.